Signed, Sealed, Delivered

Hi. Chris here. In case you faithful readers didn't know, it's been Anne writing all this time. Well, now that my three-month sabbatical has started I figured I'd sit down and read this blog, maybe even write my own entry because I've got a couple of things to report. To start with, I got a speeding ticket in the mail. My first ticket ever. In Tasmania. You know how some people surmise about "a good way to go" and whatnot? Well, if I were to say, I want my first speeding ticket to happen like here's how it would go. I know Anne already wrote about this, but I'll recount. We're in Tasmania on our way to Freycinet in our rented Toyota Camry. Anne's in front, Gerhard in back. We're driving along, all is well. All of the sudden, I realize ... CRAP! I forgot my license. No biggie, says Gerhard, we won't get pulled over. He also offers to drive, but the problem is, he's not on the rental agreement and Anne can't drive because she's never driven on the left side of the road before (Anne here - this will change once we're in New Zealand. I will conquer my fears!) Anyway, I better carry on. At about this time, we'd been following a big, slow truck for awhile and a rock kicked up and smacked the windshield right as another big truck passed in the oncoming lane. I had no idea who kicked the rock up but I knew I wanted to get away from all trucks. So what did I do? What any responsible person would do. I kept my distance from the truck in front of us, waited for the next "overtaking zone" to arrive and went into the passing lane. Just as I was passing the truck, Gerhard says "slow down, that was a police we just passed." So within a 10-minute span, I realized I forgot my license, a rock chipped the windshield of the rental car, and I passed a cop going 134 KPH in a 100 KPH zone.

As for the other thing to report, I pooped next to Stevie Wonder in O'Hare Airport on our way home to Kansas City for Jeff's wedding. Long story short, I was in that one handicap stall with a broken door latch in terminal 1 near gate B11, and his entourage knocked hard and inadvertently busted in on me. I know I know, what was I doing in the handicapped stall, especially after seeing that one episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm where Larry David used the handicapped stall and when he came out, a guy in a wheelchair was waiting and yelled at him? Well, stall 1's door was shut, someone had majorly miscalculated in stall 2 (mookie stinks left there curling over the lip), stall 3's door was shut, so who wouldn't choose the spacious one with the sink! Anyway, the latch failed when they knocked. I was mortified ... and star struck. So Stevie had to use the stall next to me, while I got to hear his entourage speculate and laugh about how on earth the scenario in stall 2 could've played out. Take that, Larry David.